QUEBORG

"We are the QUEBORG. Lower your intelligence and surrender your distinctiveness. We will assimilate you and add your values and religious distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile". Welcome to the Parti Québécoise version of the next generation. For those of you not from around here; the current minority Government of the Province of Quebec has introduced what they are calling their new Quebec, "Charter of Values". They will attempt to have this passed into law during this sitting of the legislator. Now if you’re a little lost fear not, I will enlighten you. You see here in Quebec anything other than the French Language and the Catholic religion has been frowned upon for many, many years. To the degree that in 1977 the Government (Also the Parti Québécoise) entered into law Bill 101 which effectively strangled any other language being used in the Province. This law was subsequently ruled unconstitutional by both the Superior court of Quebec and the Superior Court of Canada. However the Government chose to apply a clause (notwithstanding) within the Canadian Constitution which allowed the Province to immunize itself and basically ignore the court’s ruling. As you can see this is the way things go around here. Except now things are being taken too far!

In recent years a commission, (Bouchard-Taylor) was created to study "reasonable accommodation" and to recommend a road forward. The principle of this commission was to study how to bridge the gap in the growing variety of cultures and religions which are increasing here in Quebec. I believe the principle of the commission was sound; find ways to resolve conflicts, disputes and misunderstandings so that no culture felt as though their fundamental rights and values were at the mercy of anyone else’s. It was born out of highly publicized incidents such as; Hasidic Jews requesting that windows be darkened in a local health club where women traditionally practice aerobics, dance and other healthy activities while dressed primarily in spandex ( for the record I am a fan of women wearing spandex). Other incidents included privileged parking during religious holidays, men not being frisked (patted down) by women police officers, etc, etc....I think you get the idea right? Canada has a very liberal immigration policy and in the last ten years the number of immigrants from religions other than Catholic, cultures other then Aglosaxon or Euro-French have taken advantage and come to Canada. Many of them have chosen Quebec as their new home. The end story here is that the Bouchard-Taylor commission made some recommendations on how a better harmony could be achieved between all these divers cultures.  Now the QueBorg has taken those recommendations, twisted them and made them their own.

 

The fearful thing here is the hidden agenda of the QueBorg as it relates to this new initiative of, "Quebec values". You see there has always been an open, widely accepted notion that there is an undercurrent in this society that is outright racist towards English speaking people. It is not all Francophone's by any means and most Francophone Quebecers (even those who are) would deny this. It hides discreetly below the surface of everyday life and only explodes onto the surface on occasion when a Francophone Employee of the Transit Corporation refuses to speak or even recognize English from a paying customer. Or some other similar event brings that underlying racism to the surface. As a rule it hides itself well and allows for daily life here to continue without to many disasters or confrontations. In fact most English speaking Quebecois/Canadians do very well here. Most of us are integrated fully into the society and communities we inhabit. In fact we do extremely well and most of our families, like mine have children who are fully bilingual, have numerous friendships, colleagues and loved ones who interact daily with the serenity comparable to any country with a singular or dominant culture and religion. Everyone knows it’s there but it’s not an everyday issue. That is until now. Now it’s an issue because instead of openly admitting that the QueBorg is racist, they are hiding under a veil of standardization, commonality, harmony and peace amongst all the cultures and religions that share this Province as a home. It is anything but designed to do that. It’s one and only goal is to make French culture including the Catholic religion and French language the only and uniquely common thing. It seeks only to make us all the same. Their same....the QueBorg same! What they have demonstrated in so proposing this is they are intellectually bankrupt.

It is a play on the lowest common denominator within this society. It is nothing more then a sad attempt to secure power using the one and only tool this government has. FEAR! You take an aging, predominately french speaking population, combined with a significantly under educated segment. You tell them their lot in life is the result of those same individuals who lost them the 1995 referendum for Independence. You make them, AFRAID! You tell them their culture, language and values will disappear. That the "others" will take over with their Hijabs, Veils, Kippah's and Turbans. You tell them they need you to protect them and their values. You create a "Charter of Values" and you tell them vote for you because you'll protect them. You see my friends, everyone knows that everyone else has a difficult time with others beliefs. The QueBorg know this. They know Quebecers in general have a difficult time with it.


They also know people in general have issues with the demonstrations of those beliefs. In reality most do not like to openly admit it but at times other cultures and religious beliefs and values clash with our own values and we get our noses out of joint. Generally though we find our bearings and move forward with the understanding that individuality and freedom of expression is what we truly value. So if equality is what the QueBorg is genuinely after, should their "Charter of Values" not be applied equally to everyone? If they were truly serious about making it equal would they not also remove the crucifix in the Parliament building in Quebec? The QueBorg says it should not or would not be removed because it has quote, "historical relevance". Should not the Mayor of a small town be prohibited from saying the lords prayer (Catholic version, in french) at the start of each public meeting? If it is harmony and equality they truly seek then should these same things not also be removed or stopped? If you are at all logical you will answer one of two ways. First you might say. Absolutely! If it applies to everyone it should apply to everyone. Second you might say. "I don't give a crap who says what prayer, who hangs what where and who calls Christmas, Christmas. It does not have a single ounce of impact on me. Has it not struck anyone as ironic that Atheists, or Agnostics' have no issue with Christmas trees, or Hijabs or crucifix's?

I am of the second school of thought. You see when it comes down to it, I do not care if the Doctor caring for my sick child wears a kippah; I only care about their competency to heal my child. I do not care if the police officer responding to a break in at my home when my family is there and I am not wears a 4 inch crucifix around their neck. I only care about their ability to protect my family. I don't care about the woman wearing a hijab who teaches my son at high school. I care about her ability to teach my child, to educate him, to make him a better person. When you rub away all the annoyances that we claim as a result of religious or cultural diversity the simple fact remains;  Equality does not mean giving up all that you cherish or believe, it means celebrating others beliefs and values but more importantly respecting them. It lies in something Euclid wrote in a book written 2000 years ago about Mechanical Law, quote;  "Things which are equal to the same thing are also equal to one another, this is self evident" end quote. If we apply Euclid's words in a social context this means that all of these people with whom we share nothing, we share everything. We are created equal, with equal value and equal opportunity not to be restricted due to ones personal, religious or cultural beliefs or demonstration of such. This is the underlying value of what makes this country great. People often say to me, "well you know if we went to their country and started demanding all kinds of rights and conditions we would never get them". My response is. "That is exactly the point! Here (Canada) is not there ( wherever that principle prevails). That is why people come here and why we do not go there". It is a right we cherish and no one should underestimate how that is perceived and respected elsewhere in the world. We should be damn proud of it and we should fight any attempt to dimish this world wide standing. Multiculturalism is not a weakness. It is a strength. Diversity is power, uniqueness is an opportunity to discover and to be enlightened. Singularity, assimilation and master race has always failed. History has shown us this. The world is complex and changing rapidly. To fail to recognize this is of detriment to no one but ourselves.

I have had the unique privilege of traveling all over the world and working all over North America. I love many places I have visited or worked. However I have always said that there is no place I would rather live then here in Quebec. The woman I love is as, "pure lain" Quebecois as they come. I have numerous Quebecois friends who both do and don't speak English. I love most of the people here (the none racist ones). I work in French here. I communicate principally in French. I do not go into stores, restaurants or businesses and begin speaking in English. I don't do this because doing so is an insult and a refusal to recognize that French is the predominant language. That the language should be protected, we should respect it. My Grandparents taught me this. They were first generation Finnish (Finland) immigrants to Quebec. They didn't expect French people to speak Finnish or English. They understood that this was their Province, their country and that (my Grandparents) chose to come here so they should respect what was already here. The argument can be made and will be made about who has been here the longest, that this is Canada, that they should learn English, blah, blah, blah... The simple undeniable fact is this. The French speaking population here out numbers all other languages 8 to 1. So you can argue whatever you want but you cannot argue that. This fact however does not justify what the QueBorg is about to attempt to pass into law. It is blatantly xenophobic. Make no mistake either this is not a language debate.

I have always said I would not leave this Province even if Quebec separated from Canada. I now see however that the old Party Quebecoise, lead by Rene Levesque, with visions and dreams ( which I respected) of a Province becoming a Nation built on the ingenuity, the blood, sweat, tears and soul of French/English Quebecers has been lost. It has been replaced by those who claimed in the 1995 referendum that the sovereignty movement lost due to quote, "Money and the Ethnic vote". It has been replaced by a dreadfully intolerant group of political individuals who lack core leadership and demonstrate that they are nothing more than suit wearing ideologues vomiting the same filth a those of  Nazis, White Supremacists, Aryans, antisemits and all other similar Sects throughout history that have sought to grow their own strength, culture and identity by suppressing or annihilating others. Except in this case they are doing it under the guise of a political party preaching harmony and unification. Do you know your History? Does this sound familiar? I am convinced that as we peel away the true meaning of what the Queborg is proposing it will become clear that this is not what true Quebecers really yearn for (regardless of some current polls showing 57% support for this "Charter of Values"). Quebecers deserve to have their world wide stature recognized for being innovators, for being tolerant and accepting. For flourishing, prospering and growing on a North American Continent surrounded by 340 million non Francophone's. Not for closing doors, building walls and assimilating cultures and religions because a handful of self-serving politicians who cannot convince the population that their sovereignty position is palatable will try and sell them this poison pill. This is a Quebec I will leave because this is just the beginning of worst things to come. A place where assimilation, elimination and conformity to one set of values is the only choice. This is not a place I would want to be part of.

This Province has much bigger fish to fry then worrying about a "Values Law". If they want to focus on values here are a few of much more substantial importance and relevance to the prosperity and well being of the Province and its people:

* Value repairing a French education system which sees as many as 40% of French Male High school students drop out.

* Value repairing a health care system which still sees people waiting 24 + hours to see a doctor in an emergency ward ( regardless of their ridiculous study that showed wait times were an average 2 hrs...seriously?)

*Value implementing solid measures to cut out the corruption at all levels of Provincial and Municipal politics.

* Value a system that sees us improve dramatically the care of our seniors so they do not eat $3 meals, get boiled in their baths and have only one nurse caring for 150 people in one building.

* Value implementing laws which severely punish those who hurt or abuse women and children.

* Value finding alternative solutions to building more asphalt roads as a solution to the transit disaster in this Province.

* Value building an economy that is supported by the private sector and not by Government money.

Those are just a few Values that I can think of. There are numerous other values that I and other Quebecers could get behind and support. My message to the QueBorg is simple. "The people of Quebec are not stupid nor ignorant; they are going to eventually see right through all your smoke screens, propaganda, rhetoric and spew. I have confidence in the people of Quebec to send you a clear and loud message about their Values. I can Guarantee you they are not the ones your trying to sell. Resistance is NOT futile".

THE END TRAIN

For those of you not from around here, there was recently a tragedy which has taken the life of some 50 people. In the late evening of Saturday July 6th a freight train parked on some tracks and loaded with crude oil outside of a small town called Lac Megantic; approximately 200km from Montreal began rolling out of control into the small town. There was no conductor aboard and the exact cause of why the train began to roll away is still unknown. What is known is that it picked up speed as it ran down hill over a 12km run towards the center of town. When it arrived in the heart of the village it came to a section of track that turned abruptly. The train with no one at the controls was going far to fast to stop or make the curve. What followed can easily be described as the '' Train from Hell''. The railway cars began derailing, piling one into the other in a twisted heap. The impact was such that some of the rail cars carrying the crude oil split open and began to burn and explode. The subsequent firestorm, explosions and destruction surpassed even the most perverted filmmakers mind. The blast and fire leveled some 60 buildings it the center of town. Right next to the tracks was a popular Bar/Cafe ( Musique Cafe) which was bustling at that time of the evening with young people enjoying a warm summer night. The final outcome has been pure devastation. This Blog however is not about runaway trains, incompetent railway executives, lacks transport regulations, or even the hero's who rushed into action to try and limit the carnage. This Blog is about the fragility of life.

Do you think those young people gathered to enjoy a drink, some music and companionship could have ever imagined what was in store for them that evening? I am sure none of them, while sipping a drink on the terrace overlooking the train tracks found themselves contemplating how that evening might end. Perhaps they were thinking about the cute girl or guy at the other end of the Bar. Perhaps about a weekend wedding to attend, a job to go do on Sunday morning. Perhaps the conversations centered around the upcoming fall semester of college or university. Perhaps there were conversations about the recent NHL draft or the Canadiens acquisition of Daniel Briere. Perhaps as we have all done before when surrounded by those who's company we enjoy and love; the conversation was about everything and nothing. Just idle conversation. I believe no one was talking about runaway trains, hazardous material, insufficient security measures or anything at all to do with dying that evening. But death is what these young people got. Their lives ended in a mangled hunk of steel, bricks, mortar, fire and oil. It was a horrible and unjustified way for thier lives to end.

This is, in essence, the heart of this Blog. It is about the fragility of life. The pure reality that it can end for any of us; anywhere, anytime and under any circumstances. Some which we could never fathom. It is the reality that what is most important in these tragedies is not the net value of the assets lost, who is to blame, or where It went wrong. The most important part of it is the loss of the human asset. Is it possible that one of those who died tragically that night might have been the next Doctor to discover a cure for Cancer or HIV? An engineer who might have invented an alternative source of fuel. A teacher who would inspire generations of students to greatness. A Father or a Mother who would have raise their children in a nurturing and stimulating environment that propelled them to become leaders who revolutionized politics and the life of men and women. These are possibilities which will never be realized. At least not by those so unfortunate to have found themselves in the center of Lac Megantic that eventful night. This is the toll of an event such as the one that occurred. It is not measured by value, it is measured and should be measured in lost opportunity, lost influence and most of all, lost love.

Each of those who lost their lives leaves behind, Fathers, Mothers, sister, brothers, grandparents, uncles, cousins and friends. They leave the living with the obligation to contemplate the lost possibilities, the meaningless loss of their lives. There is no easy way to alleviate the pain, the anger, the loss. There is only sadness and pain. There is only wondering about the, ''what might have been'', the, ''what could have been''. There in lies the tradgedy of humanity, the reality of the fragility of the life we live. No one knows how it will end. Or where, or under what circumstances. It is held in the old cliche, '' live life everyday as if it was your last one'', everyone knows this is not possible. That as humans we rarely contemplate the end. We rarely do so other then when faced with events such as the one at Lac Megantic or when we attend the funeral of a loved one or friend. As a rule, we rush through our days, weeks, months and years. Tragedies occur all around us but for some not so understood reason we feel immune from the grasp of death. We ride above it believing it will never happen to us. The car accident, the fire, the drowning, the cancer, and all the other events that claim, '' others'' will not claim us. It won't happen that way to us. So we live our lives without realizing or understanding its fragility and the fact that every moment in time is not a given it is a gift.

When you leave home tomorrow ask yourself what guarantee you have that you will come back that evening. Think of your wife, husband, children. Think about those you love. Ask yourself when the last time was you took time to let them know exactly how much they mean to you. When was the last time you were with close friends and you shared with them how much you value them. The last time you spoke with co workers you spend more time with then your family and told them how much you enjoy the opportunity to work with them. When was the last time you actually did something for you? Not for anyone else. When was the last time you decided to make your life better? To take charge and make your life your own. How long has it been since you did any of that? If it has been forever or never, ask yourself this. How sure are you that there will be a tomorrow for you? How sure are you will get the chance to, ''do it later'' ? If you were standing in the middle of a small town called Lac Megantic having a quite drink, would you have regrets? Would you believe that there was a tomorrow to take on the world and all the things you put off. A chance to say to all those you care about just how much they mean to you. Of course you would believe there was a tomorrow,  you believe you have a right to a tomorrow. I am sure that those 50 people in Lac Megantic thought exactly the same thing that evening. For them, there is no tomorrow.

Over the next few months the story will fade from the headlines. The families, relatives and friends will move forward. Slowly, painfully and with much sorrow they will move on. It is the reality of life. The living earn the burden of going on without the lost. The ones they lost are gone and will never come back. Will never have the chance to do all those things we so take for granted. My friends, understand that it all balances on the edge of envelope. This thing we call life.Your expiry date is not predetermined.  It is not stamped on your forehead. It could be tomorrow, next month, next year, in 50 years. We do not get the privilege of knowing and in most cases chosing. For if we did, I am sure we would spend much more time loving those we love, cherishing those we cherish and living each day to the fullest.....especially if we knew that the end train was coming for us.

Rob

TRYING?

What are you trying?


That overweight girl you just made fun of riding her bike down the street; she is trying. She wants to lose weight. She wants to be in better shape. There is this boy she hopes will ask her to the prom. She is trying to adhere to a stereo type society has created. But to her that does not matter, she is just trying to improve herself for her, not for anyone else. That man standing outside your office building in the cold smoking a cigarette. You know, the one you always point at and say "that is so gross; he deserves to be out here in the cold". He is trying. He has cut back in the last 8 months from 2 packs a day to 5 cigarettes a day. He wants to play soccer with his kids on the weekends. So he is trying to quit, so he can actively play with his children and be around when they get older. He wants desperately to be in better health. That girl at school who everyone calls a "hoe" or a "scank" or "dirty" because she dresses sexy and has an easy way with the boys. She is trying. She is trying to forget about how her Mother tells her she is ugly every day. How she will never be attractive to anyone. She wants to put that out of her mind, to prove to herself that she is not what her mother tells her she is. She knows she is beautiful, she is trying to prove to herself that she is in fact beautiful. It is the only way she knows how. That boy you see pass your house every day at around 4pm dressed like a bum. The one you say to yourself "that kid has nothing to do, I see him every day, he should get a job". He is trying. He is 18 and he dropped out of high school when he was in grade 9. Since then he goes to his dish washing job every day at 4:30pm and he finishes at 1:00am and walks back by your house but you are already in bed. That kid goes to professional school every day from 8:00am to 3:30pm because he wants to make sure he is not a dish washer for the rest of his life.

Those people they are all trying something. In fact everyone is trying something. Regardless of how perfect you think your life is or how superior you are to anyone else, your trying to. You might be trying to compensate for insecurity, a fear, a pain, some past event. Regardless, you’re trying something. Unfortunately what it seems like most though; is that most of us spend way too much time trying to judge or criticize others. To set ourselves above those who are the most visually vulnerable to our judgments. In my mind we should perhaps spend much more time trying to improve ourselves. We live in a 24 hour information and media induced orgy. We seem to take enormous pleasure in spending ridiculous amounts of time watching what other people do and then spending wasted time passing our opinion on their doing and actions. We are over sensitized to the wrong thing. We think everyone's business is our business. We think it’s our right to know, but more importantly we think it’s our right to comment, judge and criticize. All the while we ignore our own weaknesses or our own need for personal improvement. We are so focused on others that we cannot or do not see ourselves. NO you say? Well let’s take a look!

Have you recently yelled at someone in front of you on the road for talking or texting on their phone? Only to answer your own cell or send a text a few hours later while behind the wheel. Yeah I thought so! Ever talked trash about someone walking down the street eating ice cream who maybe you thought didn't need an ice cream? Then later that evening step onto your scale at home before your shower only to realize you were still 15 lbs off your desired weight. Yeah I thought so. Ever go into a bar and laugh at the drunk falling down, stumbling around the place? Have you never done that yourself? Last year’s Christmas party, your cousin’s birthday party, the last stag or stagget you attended? Yeah I thought so. Ever sat in front of a TV game show and said "That idiot is so stupid they don't know the answer to that question, if that was me I would know the answer". Then to have your 10 year old ask you a few days later to help them answer some homework questions only to find yourself struggling to find the answers. Yeah I thought so. Ever been behind a car at your favorite coffee spot drive thru; with the person in front of you paying with their debit card for a $1.85 coffee? With you yelling to yourself "for God sakes, they couldn't carry 5 dollars with them". Then two days later going to the same spot and realizing you forgot your 20 bucks on your dresser and having to pull out your debit card" Yeah I thought so. The point here is simple. Everyone one of us has become a walking judge, jury and divine king of everything we do right and everything everyone else does wrong.

Everyone of us needs a lesson in humility. Me included! We spend way too much energy in the wrong place. Self-improvement is exactly that. SELF improvement! It’s rather difficult to be focused on you when you are focused on everyone else. The Internet, 24 hour News channels, the entertainment news channels, the rag magazines, they all contribute to our sense of right and obligation to judge others. To measure others misfortunes, weaknesses and mistakes against our lives. While all along ignoring those very same things which apply to us. It has become rather sad that the only reflection that many individuals use to see themselves is the reflection of others. It kind of makes mirrors redundant. Few of us have any self awareness left. While we have advanced technologically beyond our wildest dreams we have regressed equally in our human competencies. We gain perverse pleasure from considering ourselves better than others. By making foolish statements like, "I would never do that", "that person is an idiot", "that person is a bad person", "that person is just weak". Our society has been hypnotized into believing we are in some way advanced by our judgment of others. In fact we have been so distracted from focusing on who we as a society should really be judging, criticizing and ultimately working to improve, that we have ignored those truly requiring our Ire, judgment and criticism. Those would be the corrupt Politicians, corporate executives, Mega media outlets, and religious orders. who warp our world, control the outcome of far to much and who through self motivation present their agenda as reality instead of the fantasy it truly represents. These are the ones who are truly affecting you and your children’s lives. Not the overweight girl riding a bike.  Take 5 minutes to look around you, truly look around you. Then ask yourself when was the last time you stood up to defend something of value?  Used that judging and criticism power you so aptly wield and focus it on something that would improve your or your children' s lives.

For all of you out there trying something; trying to be better, more patient, more tolerant, more loving, more helpful, more forgiving. A better Mother, Father, friend. Trying to be in better shape, lose weight, fighting an addiction or simply trying to find your path. Never stop trying! For in that effort are values that those who criticize and judge will never understand. Resiliency and acceptance that no one is perfect and everyone needs to keep trying to improve. So now I will stop doing exactly what I have just written about. I will stop judging the Judges and criticizing the criticizers and get back to trying to improve myself....because I am sure there are plenty who know me who think I should do exactly that.

Rob

NO MORE ONE ONLY

How many JOBS have you had? Recently I was discussing my Dad with some family members as we recently marked the 12th year since he has been gone. One of the conversations was about how my Dad, had only really had one job in his career (life). Like many of us in our Forties we grew up with Parents ( mainly the Dad) who had only worked for one company. In many cases they may have worked in different departments or at different tasks but generally for the same company. This got me to thinking about my own career and the incredible number of jobs I have had in my life so far. It shows the staggering contrast about what we value and how the economic and professional landscape has changed so dramatically. So I decided for the fun of it to do a review of all the different jobs I have had starting back to my very first paying job starting when I was 15 years old right up to now.

So here goes....

15 years old: Painting tin roofs on summer cottages: Wage $3 dollars an hour. My friend Stephane who I painted with use to fry eggs on the minor angled verandas. Yes folks it was hot enough to do that. He would spray PAM on the tin and at around lunch time you could fry eggs. It would take awhile but they would cook. In fact at times it was so hot the paint would literally bake onto the tin.

DJ at the summer community center ( same place I painted roofs: It was fun spinning records ( yes kids we called them records back then; 1981). The girls seemed to like it. And I got paid $18 bucks a night Friday, Saturday nights and holidays.

First aid technician ( ST Johns ambulance): got to do it at the old forum for the Canadiens games, concerts, Grand Prix, etc) it paid a whopping 15$ per event. The Canadiens games were awesome. I never did drugs but back in 1982 at the Nazareth, Styx, etc. concerts I was stoned by association.

Toy store electronics clerk: Yes kids again they did have electronics back in 1983. In fact the store I worked at had one of the first Atari computers ( yes Atari made more then video games). I used to sell gettoblasters, Miniature Video games that looked like the actual full size Arcade models ( Pac Man, Asteroids, Donkey Kong, etc..


Courrier, Barman, Line maintenance planner; Yup I did three jobs simultaneously. It was so bad as a matter of fact that I had this hiding place in my Planners job where i could go nap for an hour or so each day cause I was literally working 20 hours a day between the 3 jobs. This
didn' t last to long. Otherwise I would have died.

 Summer Job; Golf course Maintenance worker; getting up at 3:45am every morning to be at work for 5am. Nothing glamorous there but I got to work with a truly outstanding individual named Buster who became my first (career mentor). I also knew at that stage that I was working towards something bigger.

Summer job: Director of Maintenance Water park; My first ever director title. It didn't mean much I had like 4 guys working in my dept. It was by far the most entertaining and eye opening ( yes opening) job I ever had. It was torture having to repair the slides with all those bikini' s running around

Winter Job; Snow maker; Yes when mother nature didn't want to cooperate I helped her along. Well me and the 11 other guys I worked with. Working Midnight to 8am shift in minus 35 degree with minus 55 wind chills driving around on a skidoo on a empty ski hill working with freezing cold water and compressed air. It was one of the most awesome and exhilarating jobs i ever had!

Winter Job: Snow Cat operator (groomer);Working all kinds of shifts pushing snow around the mountain ( Those damn snowmakers!). Loved the night shift all the lights on the mountain off just driving around with the machine lights on and good tunes playing on the Radio. Talking back and forth with the two other operators somewhere else on the mountain.

Director of Construction; My big break, hired by a land developer to oversee the construction of a 300 home private community with 18 hole golf course, tennis courts, pool, large clubhouse with full amenities. Scariest experience at first. I was in way over my head but had the good fortune of working with some incredible contractors and some very patient owners and team members.

Director of Summer operations, construction and maintenance; This was "THE JOB" it set the tone for years to come for me and what I was able to achieve professionally. Responsible for all aspects of summer development for what became the number one resort in Eastern North America. The people I was priviledged to work with in this organization was incredible, truly unique and a once in a lifetime ride. Roger, Hugh, Gary, Bryce, Marc, Michel, the list could go on forever. The genius that existed within that company was remarkable. I build golf courses, tennis clubs, beach clubs, marinas, indoor water parks, mountain top restaurants, hotels and condos, roads, bridges and tunnels. You name it I got to do it with my team. I Grew with this company to eventually leave as a VP and it provided me with all the tools to start my own company.

President and Managing Director; sounds like a very important role right? Well you could just as well called it, chief washroom cleaner, head zoo keeper and local resident psychiatrist. In fact it was an amazing ride. I along with my eventual partners built a multi facet, Operations, construction, consulting and special event company which spanned 3 provinces and a US office. We worked for some incredible organizations and companies. We managed some fantastic projects and got to organize events such as the 1999 Export ''A'' Skins Game, The Wayne Gretzky and Friends Invitational, Three RMCC Tournaments, the Prime Minister ( Jean Chretien) & President ( Bill Clinton) Golf day. We managed some outstanding golf, water park and resort facilities. I had the priviledge of working with some incredible people in a variety of locations from Quebec to Ontario to Alberta, to PEI, BC, Maine, Florida and many others. Sold the company in the end cause I was burnt. Truly. I was burnt. Had spent the better part of 5 years travelling across North America and I had enough. There is a strong price to pay family wise when your focus is on making your company a success and making money.

Interim COO and GM; I did two short stints on an interim basis for two outstanding organizations that were restructuring.

Semi retired...yup you read that right. I was toasted.

Director of operations; Building parks, sports fields and complexes.

Business advisor; Working for various developers, promoters, engineering firms and large companies assisting them with their projects.

So there it is. A career summary. I left out some jobs which I did within specific companies where I started with the title mentioned above but also did other jobs. Did you count those? Well its 15 jobs for more than 15 companies, from Fifteen years old to Forty-Eight years old. So in 33 years I have averaged 2.2 years per job. That is a big, big difference from the one job my Dad had for over 30 years. He retired after 30 years of service just after his 50th birthday with what they called back then a '' Golden Handshake''. In a way it was the best thing that he did based on the fact he passed away 9 years later just short of his 60th birthday. I was fortunate because from thirty fours years old I basically got to write my own ticket. I had the flexibility and the opportunity to choose what I did and when I did it.

Today I look at my growing children and ponder. What is in their future? My daughter is at University studying to be a Teacher, My oldest son is at College studying to be a lawyer, slash ''sports agent'', slash, model, slash ''best damn whatever'' he decides. My second son will graduate this year from high school and is going on to college where he was just recently accepted. He is a brain and can basically write his own ticket. My other sons are still in high school and elementary and have plenty of time before thinking about jobs. I do wonder though what the job prospects will be for them as they grow and explore the job market. My two oldest both hold down part time jobs as they go to school. They are traditional retail and service jobs. I am curious to know how many jobs they will have over their life time. Will there be good stable jobs for them when they want to settle into a career? Or is the word career, as old as the idea that you could work your whole life at one company. Throughout my career I have had the very distinct opportunity to work for people and have people work with me ( not for me, I don't come from that school). I have watched people that worked with me leave their jobs for a few bucks an hour more. For some small fringe benefit. I have seen people with 5-10 years experience walk away. Not because they were badly treated but because it simply seemed like they needed to change. Some referred to it as, '' growing their horizons''. Its funny though because most of those individuals seemed to continue to need to grow their horizons as they moved from job to job with no real advancement, growth or development. They simply appeared trapped in a running wheel, just like a hamster. Moving and moving but never going forward.

Our world has changed and evolved. Working in 20 and 30 years from now will not be what it was or what it is today. Too much is happening, to many dramatic changes in the new ''Global Economy''. The way we interact, the way we communicate, the way we execute is changing more and more. Things will be very, very different. I just hope my children get the same chance I did. to work with truly exceptional people and organizations which allows them to grow, try, fail, learn and prosper. People ask me which was my favorite job. Its hard to pick just one....looking back however I would say I was happiest roaming around the Ski Hill in the dead of the night while most people were sleeping. Riding around on a Skidoo, tears freezing to my face, standing beside a roaring snow gun with the moon so close you could reach out and grab it. Doing with my snow making buddies what Mother was refusing to do....making it snow! That my friends was NOT work!

Rob

COWBOYS AND INSANITY

This past seven days the world has watched transfixed on the events in Boston. The devastating detonation of two home made '' Pressure cooker'' bombs; which took the life of 23 year old Lingzi Lu, a Boston University graduate student, Krystle Campbell a 29-year-old restaurant manager and Eight-year-old Martin Richard of Boston’s Dorchester neighborhood.  They died for simply showing up at a marathon to cheer on the participants. It is excruciatingly sad. The bombing also left more then 170 people wounded; many of them with severed limbs. These events are alleged to have been perpetrated it was later learned by two brothers. One of the Brothers was killed in a gun fight early Friday morning and the second was captured in the early evening of that same day. I won' t mention their names in this blog or where they are from as in my mind it is irrelevant. If the are actually guilty (only one will eventually face trial) then they deserve no further recognition for the carnage, pain, devastation and destruction they have caused. The ones who deserve consideration are the ones mentioned who lost their lives or who have forever had their lives altered. My thoughts are with them.

This Blog is about a few issues that seemed to go unnoticed or certainly under reported during the 5 day media orgy. While they spent hour after hour tripping over themselves, drooling, speculating, drawing conclusions and generally just confusing the hell out of everyone; three very important issues either got no attention, the wrong attention or very little attention.

1. The number of law enforcement officials on the ground to apprehend one 19 year old suspect. 9000 vs 1.

2. The number of terrorist attacks elsewhere in the world during the same 7 day period from day one of the bombings to the capture of the final suspect.

3. The notion of  ''self radicalization'' as it relates to foreign nationals who immigrate to the United States compared to this same phenomenon which occurs with born and bread US citizens.

Lets start by the first one.

1. It was repeated over and over again as the events of Friday played out that law enforcement had over 9000 '' boots'' on the ground, searching and trying to apprehend the final suspect. The cameras saw them at every turn; trucks, cars, vans, armoured personnel carriers, helicopters, officers everywhere; guns drawn, ready for action. The number of participants from various agencies was simply staggering. Boston Police, Watertown Police, Cambridge Police, State Troopers, FBI, CIA, Homeland Security, ATF, National Guard, The Hostage Rescue Team from Quantico. These were the Agencies with agents on the ground. It has also been reported but not confirmed that elite teams from both Delta, Rangers and yes the famous Seal Team were also present ( in this case Team 5/ Team 6 was the one that got Bin Laden) . Think about this for a minute. This was an event (two homemade bombs) allegedly perpetrated by two individuals. That's two people, not 20, 40 or 70 organized individuals who executed multiple elaborate attacks against the United States. It was two guys; one 26 year old and one 19 year old. The media wasn't doing any analyses of what this meant, about how this completely lopsided ratio highlighted a major weakness in the US ability to mange these types of attacks. At the end of the evening on Friday, once the final suspect had been apprehended the representatives from all the agencies mentioned above where back slapping and applauding one another as each of them took to the microphone in front of a worldwide audience during the press conference. It struck me as ridiculous. In my mind it was like saying, '' there is this small lake 1km square and we put 9000 fishing lines in it to catch the one fish left, what an amazing feat we accomplished when we actually caught it''. No doubt there was incredible dedication, resiliance and determination demonstrated by all these men and women. That they are all heros (an MIT officer lost his life). The simple fact though, like it or not, it took way to many of them.

There is a bad, bad message that was sent here. While all the agency heads are busy celebrating their ''catch'' and the President is congratulating everyone within ear shot. They have failed to realize that they have sent a dangerous message to the hostiles in the world. The message they wanted you and me to believe is, ''we will do whatever it takes to bring those to justice' who harm, kill or injure our citizens''. Its a noble statement and a noble ideology. It is what they are supposed to do. How they did it however, is flawed to its core. What it really sent as a message is, if you attack us in multiple regions at the same or different times we will eventually not have the required resources to hunt you down. That in fact you can paralyze some of the biggest cities in the world grinding every semblance of normal life to a complete standstill. Mass transit, commerce, education, finance and so on. The statement '' shelter in place'' is self explanatory. It tells everyone that you can shut it all down and paralyze the greatest superpower in the world (ok we can debate if that's still true considering China but that's for another blog). The message which was sent as the media drooled over itself and in many cases acted like a dog in heat was not the message you want to sent to your enemies. Especially those you cannot see or find. In the final analyses the back slapping and self congratulations will go on. Its what Americans do, its what they need to do. Its how they move forward and tell themselves they are safe and freedom and goodness will always prevail. If I was them I would be worried, very worried.

2. During the same 7 days which just passed in Boston there were 140 people killed in worldwide terrorist attacks. Yes you read that right, 140 people lost their lives and countless hundreds were wounded in Iraq, Pakistan, Somalia, India, Afghanistan and other places in the same 7 day period. I am sure some of you will point out that many of the places where these terrorist attacks occurred where in places in the world where this is ''normal''. Regardless of the fact that we might consider it normal I can guarantee you that the families who lost young children or young adults or family members do not consider those attacks anywhere near, ''Normal''. Did you hear of any of these attacks? In one of them 54 people were killed by one terrorist bomb, in another 18 by a terrorist bomb at a church. Did you hear about any of those? Most probably you didn't. I bet however, that you could basically get around Boston now without a GPS or road map based on all the media coverage you watched. What is the message here? There certainly is. It is this; If the world is under attack by terrorists then nowhere is safe. Not in the US, England, France, Canada or anywhere else. As long as it predominates in one place the risk is it will occur in any place is very likely..

3. ''Self radicalization'' Did you hear the media carrying on about this as a way to appease those searching for the answer, ''why''. Why would two seemingly normal young men who basically grew up in the United States perpetrate such a heinous act in a Country that welcomed them with open arms. The question itself is justifiable and understandable. However the question was being asked with a religious or ethnic slant. This is where it goes wrong. Not everything can be written off to a global hatred for the United States. Not everything can be written off to Foreign policy or 911 or Iraq or Afghanistan. The fingers cannot always be pointed in this direction. In fact if you consider the most recent political climate in the United States you can actually see how close they walk this '' self radicalization''  line. You see it in the political propaganda that today is the media in the United States. There is no more unbiased reporting. Each 24hr news channel is either left or right. All politics today is left or right. On one side is the, ''crazies'' and the other side the ''normals'' and whichever side your on the title is interchangeable. You can feel this in the recent, '' right to bear arms'' debate currently ragging. The 2nd amendment zealots who you know could just as easily '' self radicalize'' if ever they thought their rights to own guns was in jeopardy. The United States has seen this home grown phenomena before. You need only mention the names of Timothy McVeigh, Terry Nichols, Michael & Lori Fortier, Eric Rudolph. These individuals are born & raised Americans who ''self radicalized'' and together through their two acts killed 169 and injured 791 American citizens in Oklahoma City and Atlanta. Look at the devastation these individuals caused. They were not ''naturalized'' Americans. They were not from a war torn part of the world, they did not practice a religion often identified as the axis of evil. No, they were Americans and they had no problem ' self radicalizing''. The truth be known. There are bad people everywhere. People who need to make a statement, to destroy, to attempt to manipulate, to create chaos. They can just as easily be two young men naturalized from a foreign land as from right at home. It does not matter how they got to where they got in executing their evil. What does matter is they will always be amongst us and to attempt to write it off as simply an issue from a foreign land is an insult to everyone's intelligence.

Time will march on. It always does, The families and friends of those devastated by the Boston bombings will move on. Painfully slow, time will march on for them without those they love. The scars and burden of the destruction will live on forever in the bodies and minds of those injured by this terrorist act. It is the unfortunate reality of the world we now find ourselves in. Perhaps we could find and invest the same type of energy that 9000 individuals did on Friday in finding a way to make the world a better place where this kind of atrocity does not need to happen and where the media actually focus on something more then a game of Cowboys and Indians on steroids.

Rob

ANOTHER LIGHT GONE

REHTAEH PARSONS

On October 14, 2012 I wrote a Blog titled, '' 73 Sheets''. This Blog was a sad tribute and a reflection of our failures in protecting a young girl named Amanda Todd. This young girl had posted a Youtube video where she described, by using 73 sheets of paper, in front of the camera the hell she had been living. I remember the outrage of the moment. All the talking heads in government, the media, the education system and law enforcement telling anyone who would listen that they understood the challenges of our youth and that they had a plan, or the plan needed improvement or they were on top of the situation, or on and on. Obviously not. On April 4th a young 17 year old girl named Rehtaeh Parsons committed suicide by hanging herself. It appears that when she was fifteen years old she had been gang raped during a party where she became intoxicated. The rape was only the beginning of the decent into hell for this young girl. You see it seemed the four boys who allegedly raped her felt it was necessary to begin hounding her through the Internet, e-mails and Internet postings. Photos of the alleged incident (a boy smiling while he raped her as she vomited out a window) were circulated around her school, causing her to drop out and change schools in hopes that the bullying would end. It did not. Are you disgusted and sickened yet?

REHTAEH PARSONS

After some investigation by Canada's finest; it seemed there was a lack of evidence to arrest the 4 youths. Yes regardless of the photo evidence, the postings and the fact that she was being intimidated and bullied by these very same individuals it remained an unprosecuted offense. That is until the young woman could no longer stand the abuse she was facing and ended her life. Now the Royal Canadian Mounted Police in Halifax say a person who provided new information is willing to verify who the suspects are and cooperate with investigators. The reopening of the case comes after police were publicly criticized for their handling of the case. Wonderful is it not? This blog though is not about the GRC. Nor the alleged rapists. This Blog is about us. It is about us ( the adults) the same way it was in the Amanda Todd case. It is about our failure as a society to protect our most valued assets. We have increasingly dropped lower and lower in regards to our ability to fix anything which touches our youth. Rehtaeh lived in a world that 95% of today's adults who are over forty years old can not even begin to understand. You can stammer all you like about that statement; but just because you have a facebook page does not make you, ''aware'' or ''hip'' or ''wired in''.  Rehtaeh lived in a time where our technology has slowly crawled its was past our humanity. She lived in a time of single parent families, constant bombardment by social media, exposure to an over sexed media, of violent films, TV and video games. All of which twist and glorify every debauchery we can fantasise about. She lived in a time when your mistakes do not end in the basement of a friends house around a game of spin the bottle. She lived in a 24hr media and socially induced orgy of photos, tweets, facebook, texts, instagrams...and on and on.... She lived in a time where the adults are at the mercy of their children. A time where the power of technology is in the hands of our youth and adults just simply hang on for dear life.

AMANDA TODD

You see this in no longer a time where regardless of if you liked it or not your parents were still smarter then you. Our children are now masters of the devices and forms of communication and the parents, educators, politicians, law enforcement, and media simply try to keep up. Those mentioned here have no true way of helping the youth of today. Let alone Rehtaeh. They love to talk a big talk. You will see them in the days to come on your TV, Laptop, tablet or phone; telling anyone who will listen that they are working hard, that they are on top of the situation...blah, blah, blah...and our young people will continue to die needlessly. We have it wrong people. We truly do not know what the solution to the problem is. Bullying and intimidation knows only what we have taught it, yes what we have taught it, society owns bullying. Understand and accept that we have failed to squash it. We have lost compassion for our fellow man (woman). We are to wrapped up in ''us'' to think about anyone else. The first step would be admitting this. The second step is admitting that we really don't have a clue how to fix it. The third step is making a plan using those that might actually be able to lead us to the solution. Our children! For it is in them that the answers dwell. They are the ones we should be listening to, too find out how we the adults can implement measures and stop guards to prevent, or at the very least limit what is happening to them. They hold the key, we just need to get down from our high horses and accept that. Then use it to build them the future they deserve. Weakness is not in empowering those so they can help themselves. It is in being delusional and simply candy coating the problem. We have become experts at that.

AUDRIE POTT

Look at the pictures on my blog of these young girls. Take a look at the happiness, the innocence, the brilliance that has been robbed from our society. Take a look into the eyes of Rehtaeh, Amanda, Audrie and Marjorie. Then imagine your own children, question honestly if you know what goes on in their lives. Amongst your running from one important task to another. Do you really know what they experience? What they are exposed to? Take a look at your own children; girls or


AMANDA TODD

boys, bullying and intimidation knows no race, religion, social class or sex. I have 5 children, we have been blessed to not have any tragedy to date. Do I understand all the challenges my children face? Not even close. In fact I am ashamed because I like many of you struggle every day just to keep up with them. They go so fast, faster then we ever did. When I was 15 I had perhaps 10 really good friends and maybe 50 other people I knew as acquaintances or kids I went to school with. The farthest we communicated and interacted was within telephone reach, the bus or whoever's parent was willing to drive us. That was the size of the circle I lived in. Today our children live in a circle of 600 on line

MARJORIE RAYMOND

friends. Hundreds and hundreds of acquaintances who come to them through a wireless connection from everywhere in the world. People with malicious motivations, predators, and generally bad people. They get access to our kids and we as adults are powerless to stop them. When I was 14 and someone strange was lurking around the neighbourhood every one knew and generally the parents took matters into their own hands, thereby quelling any potential threat. Today we as parent are impotent. We like to believe we still have a ''handle'' on what they do, what they experience. The truth is we don't and in accepting that begins the possibility of fixing it. Just because you have a smart phone does not make you smart.

Today the family and friends of Rehtaeh struggle with their loss. Society lost another opportunity at brilliance. Are they to blame? No. Are we to blame? Like it or not, until we pull our heads out of the sand, we are. There is opportunity in every loss, a chance for redemption, a chance to make right the wrongs. We have to truly want it. The failure to act is to doom ourselves to a never ending cycle of pain and loss. We can take back over the future by helping build a strong foundation for our children. To do this means giving up our sense of power and allowing them to show us how.

Rob

Dad

Five years ago I sat down to write a story to say goodbye to my Dad (For my Dad) who had passed away some 7 years prior. It was the first blog of this site, it would become a 5 year journey for me. Originally I did it mainly to help myself, to find a way back from where my life had gone since his death. I thought by trying to finally come to terms with the loss his death represented to me it might in some way fix the past. Or at very least allow me to move forward in a very different way from the past 7 year since his death. Some 5 years later I would like to say it fixed everything. Unfortunately it did not. It did not fix it because my Dad could really not help me. Now only a memory, his ability to help me moved on when he left this earth. His spirit, his memory, those moments I valued, they ended up being all that was left to help me find the path forward.

In a few days, it will mark the 12th year since he left. He left my Sister, Brother and two Step-Sisters with a void which only could be described as unimaginable. He left the woman he loved with a hole in her soul. None of us in our reconstituted family has ever been the same. He left my children with out the chance to truly appreciate the star growing brightly that he was ( my children were 9,7,5,3 when he died). Too young to understand how much of a giant he was, the anchor he was. This I guess is no different for any family that loses a loved one who was the glue and the magnet that pulled everyone in and bonded them together. My Dad was that man. Our history as a family is riddled like many others, with challenges, ups and downs. In the first 10 years of our lives we had many more downs then ups. Most of the downs can be easily attributed. My Father and Mother divorced when we were young enough to still be saved. My Father grew and evolved after the marriage to our Mother ended. I believe that he freed himself to save not only him but the children he loved so much.It was a blessing in disguise for not only him but for my Brother and Sister also. Moving on gave us the freedom to move along with him. It made us better people. We needed to be free from her and he cut the chain. It was not easy, as the scars of the past always stay and they always remind, and they often hurt. Sometimes you can touch them and in an instance you can recall all the pain, the sorrow, the torment; the memories as real as if they were yesterday. As you grow and age you find ways to grow with those scars, you learn to turn them into strength, opportunity and less into burdens. My Dad knew what he needed in his life after his divorce. He found it in a woman who became his true love. He dedicated himself to her and her two very young daughters. At the same time he invested in my brother and sister and I to help us rediscover opportunity, life and what we could become. I think the reason my dad plunged himself so diligently into his new families life was he was striving to build a life for them that he had been unsuccessful in building for us. He did it with conviction, with passion and motivation. In the end I think they would tell anyone that he succeeded. I know in my mind he did. Today my Step Sisters are both very successful women, mothers, wives and have beautiful families.

When he left suddenly that day in 2001 only 59 years old, he created a vacuum that no one in our family could ever really have anticipated or understood. Our family, like many other families were spread out over a large geographical area. All of us grown, with very busy and hectic lives. My Dad was always the glue and the magnet that brought us together. Since he has been gone we have failed miserably to keep the family together. Maybe this was natural. Perhaps it was the only thing that could happen. It is as though maybe we were really good, even great together when he was here but when he was gone. Not so much. Perhaps this often happens. I saw this same result with the family of my first wife. Her mother was the same glue, the same magnet. She kept her 5 children close and bonded. She passed away 3 months before my Dad. In a twist of faith my Dad died on what would have been her birthday. My first wife's family has never been the same either. They  have all grow far apart. It almost seems pervertedly natural. Maybe the hole they leave is more like, ''space they create''. That this, ''space'' is like a buffer that pushes everyone else outwards, makes them farther away, harder to hold on to. In the end we seem to be looking over a canyon, each member at their own end divided by the hole or the space their departure leaves. This left us blowing in the wind, not really knowing how to hold on to him or each other any longer. We simply hold on to the meories of him and what we were when he was alive. We drifted our separate ways and now only speak through e-mails or facebook. I believe we have only once since his death ever been together as a family. It is a sad legacy to his memory and what he tried to build.

I often wonder if my Dad would be disappointed and sad in the way our family grew away from each other. At how we let his departure leave such a vast void. Many times I have wanted to try and fill that space, bridge the gap or fill it in. It has aways failed. I don't think anyone else has really tried either. Not becuase they did not want to try but only because It seemed almost as though we were afraid we would fail miserably at holding up what he built. Everyone in our Family moved on the best they could and there was no way to duplicate or revive what he had created. I am not sure what I would say to him now, if ever I had the chance to talk to him. Maybe he already knew that when he was gone this is exactly how it would be. Maybe he understood better then any of us just how much of the glue and magnet he was. Maybe that's why he worked so hard to hold us together. Lots of maybes there. The sad reality is the maybe's become the only thing you can hold on to to give you comfort. If I had the chance I would want to tell him just how much I still miss him, about how every day from 12 years ago has seemed at some points impossible. That those 12 years have felt like a fracture in time, like the world has moved but I didn't move equal to it. That my life turned in another direction to move as far away from the reality of his death that it could. I tried to shelter my own emotions from the enormity of the truth that he was gone and could never come back. You build whatever you can, you seek solace in any vice which will help you keep going. You build a reality that is so far detached from the pain that you blind yourself to the damage you cause through being lost.

My life imploded 12 years ago. His death, my Mother in Laws death, 911, all to much in a short 9 month span. It all disintegrated into pieces that I have never been able to glue back together. I lost everything I cared about. I lived a nightmare that played itself out in a none stop loop. I hurt those I loved, I did things I never would have thought possible. Finally five years ago when i wrote ( For My Dad) I began to deal with his death. This allowed me to begin to rebuild my life. Personally, professionally and morally. I have been down a tough road. The road is mine though, I own the full responsibility for what I built. No one shares this responsibility.  I have worked hard to tear down all the wrong and rebuild it the right way. In a fashion my Dad would have been proud of. I have had help. Lots and lots of help. There are people I owe everything too for helping me find my way back, like the Ti-Oiseau.. In the end though, you can never get back everything you lost, you can never be what you once were. You cannot repair all the damage.It cannot be erased and you cannot rewind it. You can only hope to make it something new. Something that would stand as a testament to those you hurt. A testament to my Dad to show him that everything he struggled to create, everything he sacrificed to build for our family was not lost after all. That somewhere, maybe in the end, the hole he left was actually not a hole but a bridge. A bridge to use to get back to where I needed to go.

I would like to take a walk together in the woods out back of his home; just me, my dad, my brother and my sister. Followed along by my dads two big Labradors, wandering aimlessly as we meander through the trees, together again the 4 of us. The chance to be a kid one more time, a chance just to be together to make it all right again, to find the love and happiness we once knew. To laugh, and to cry, to debate our lives and the turns they have taken. A chance to not take for granted something we all take for granted, a simple walk with someone we love. I dream of walking out of the woods to the house where all those who he loved and who loved him were there waiting. His wife, his step daughters, all of his grandchildren. He touched so many lives it would be incredible to touch him one last time, It is a pipe dream I know but you take what you can get and you hold it close. The harshness of life is everything has more value in hindsight, except hindsight does not get you reality, it only feeds you small doses of memories and nostalgia. It allows you to hope for the unachievable, what you know you cannot have, it gives you only what you need to try and keep going while simply surviving with what you actually have.

Time will always catch up to us. Reality also does. It is the inevitability of life. We must be accountable for our actions, no matter the reason for them. Over the next few months I will have to face the consequences of the 9 years of time I lost in the void his departure left. I will face these realities knowing that I will always have the greatest of who he was within me and no void can ever take that away.

Love you Dad. Miss you.

Rob

SMOKE

SMOKE is smoke! Regardless of the color. As a past volunteer fireman I can attest to that. When you find yourself in it you know it and will never forget it. Smoke immediately tears up your eyes, they begin to burn, your throat clenches, your nose tries to stop taking in air. You feel dizzy, disoriented, you feel sick, panicked, you want to runaway. You want to flee. Well, that is exactly how I felt watching the debacle of the, "chimney watch" at the Sistine chapel. Every time the smoke began to billow from the chimney I wanted to throw-up. It is hard to believe that in this day in age, countless thousands would gather in Vatican Square, the talking heads (media) would descend (4500 accredited members) and countless millions would be glued to their TV's to watch a chimney. Its not so much the chimney that made me sick, it was the spectacle of it all. All of that to watch an organization with a horrid past, countless questionable acts throughout history; a sickening record of pedophilia, combined with the blatant attempts to silence the critics and cover up their atrocities. All of it to watch them elect their next Leader.

Yes my friends the Catholic church is back (well they never went away) from its slow decent into the abyss that is today's modern society. It gathered its fearless leaders for the "conclave" in an orgy of gold & red which surpassed the last gay pride parade in New York city. It is back to try and reposition itself amongst its followers, to become a beacon of hope, direction and goodness. Have you stopped laughing yet? Hang on. What does the brain trust that is the Catholic church decide to do after it orchestrates the departure of Benedict? What does it decide to do to rejuvenate itself, increase its followers, grow its base, re-invent itself? Wait for it........it elects a 76 year old Pope who the day after his election calls for the churches followers to return to their pilgrim roots. HUH? WHAT? Someone get an interpreter we might have heard that wrong. WOOPPSSS...no he said that in English. Seriously? Pilgrim Roots? In the age of man where you can't even get your kids to talk to each other when they are sitting right across from each other (Dad, texting is much easier then talking). In an age when if you do use a phone your chances of talking to a live living breathing person is less likely then you meeting an Alien. In a time where if you are seen reading an actual book with a cover and paper pages your considered very, very old.....this guy wants to take the church and its followers back to its Pilgrim Roots.

Seventy Six years old Jorge Mario Bergolio ( Pope Francis) is gonna have them 20, 30 and 40 somethings just rushing back to the church wearing their pilgrim hats and clothes...ready to go on a witch hunt. I can see it now. Those 20,30 and 40 somethings flooding out of buses and Subway stations, pulling up in their smart cars....running up the stairs of the grand old churches to follow the new King of the pilgrims. I am having visions of Lord of the Rings. All hail the King! For God sakes seriously? What is it with this organization? Are they that delusional that they cannot see? Do they really believe the Simpson are real and that Bart never ages. That Hilary Clinton didn't know Bill was a womanizing hound dog? That the Kardasians really have talent? Judging by the decisions they make and the way they run their institution those answer would be yes. These guys (yes they still feel in the 21st century that the input of women is NOT required) live so much in isolation of reality that they have become nothing more then a cult. Their numbers are dwindling every where except in African countries which is holding up its numbers and where it spends incredible amounts of time cultivating its demented message to people who don"t even know what the Internet is. That shows you their strategy and their ideology. They have lost the, "knowing" so go to a place in the world where their are many who still are not enlightened. Pilgrim thing starting to sound right?

What bothers me the most however is the sickening track record of this organization when it comes to child abuse and pedophilia. If this organization was any other it would have long since been dismantled, disgraced and its primary leaders thrown into jail. It has subverted investigations, attempted to buy silence, disavowed its responsibility and protected the guilty. Any other organization would have been ripped down by society and its parts scattered to the four corners of the planet. Yet here we are in the 21st century, gathered in front of the TV, Smart phone or Internet, staring at a chimney. We should be ashamed of ourselves, the 1.5 billion followers should be ashamed of themselves. To follow this organization and to continue to promote its existence is a slight to God ( if there is a God). I make no grips with the idea that if someone wants to follow some religion (whichever that might be) then they are certainly free too. In a time where i believe spirituality is a must and that each individual should strive to find more of it, i am sickened by the idea that 1.5 billion people can be so lost.

Maybe it makes sense then that the Catholic Church should elect a Pope who calls for the return to its Pilgrim roots. It is clear based on its followers fascination with a chimney and smoke and what they are willing to accept from this organization that they might just in fact be as enlightened as the Pilgrims were.

Rob